If you love humor, this is the one for you. Here’s a collection of top 5 funniest jokes of all time!
Teacher: “Anyone who thinks he’s stupid may stand up!”
*Nobody stands up*
Teacher: “Im sure there are some stupid students over here!!”
*Little Johnny stands up*
Teacher: “Ohh, Johnny you think you’re stupid?”
Little Johnny: “No… i just feel bad that you’re standing alone…”
Dad: Come on, say daddy!
Dad: F*ck you, say daddy!
Baby: F*ck you, Mommy!
Mom: Honey, I’m home!
Baby: F*ck you!
Mom: Who taught you that?
Dad: Son of a b*tch.
got shot by the pizza guyyy
all i wanted was some onion ringggss
from McDonald’s or Burgerkinggg
I believe i can soarrrr
mom slapped me in the grocery storeee
Even though im 24 I still got an imaginary dinosoarrrrr
I believe i can falllll I tripped on a bouncey ballll
Thought id post this funny jokes. Even though i got no votes.
Girl: Do you know who I am?
Girl: I am the principal’s daughter!
Boy: Do you know who I am?
Boy: Good! *walks away*
I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice in the other stall:
“Hi, how are you?”
Me: (embarrassed) “Doin’ fine!”
Stall: “So what are you up to?”
Me: “Uhhh, I’m like you, just sitting here.”
Stall: “Can I come over?”
Me: (attitude) “No, I’m a little busy right now!!”
Stall: “Listen, I’ll have to call you back. There’s an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions!
Disclaimer: All images are sourced from the web. No copyright infringement intended.
Humor: Top 10 Facebook Jokes
Facebook isn’t only a long range interpersonal communication site any longer. It has turned into a social wonder. In any critical ways, our lives are reliant on or fragmented without Facebook. Envision being not able to offer your birthday photos with your companions over the world. Or on the other hand not having the capacity to know the most recent that is occurring in the local area.
The virtual universe of Facebook with notices, photographs, posts and jabs has more genuine to us than our whole lives That is the reason, similar to some other consuming social wonder; there are a few jokes on Facebook also. We have assembled a gathering of the most ingenious jokes about Facebook here.
Facebook Joke 1:
Facebook is like a jail. You have mugshot profile picture.
You spend all your time writing on walls. And some totally undesirable people poke you around unnecessarily.
Facebook Joke 2:
A grandmother left her farm, barn, horses, chickens, pigs and $1million cash to her granddaughter. The granddaughter was overwhelmed and said “Granny, I never knew you had so many assets.
Where are they?” The grandmother’s last word on her death-bed was ‘Facebook’.
Facebook Joke 3:
Teacher asks student, “What do you call a place where people talk to themselves, write on walls, cook imaginary food in fictional cafes, grow crops that do not exist and count make-believe money?”
Student answers, ‘Mental hospital.’
Teacher growls, ‘ No you idiot. Facebook.’
Facebook Joke 4:
If Facebook is a fridge then we keep opening it every few seconds to see if there is anything interesting in it!
Facebook Joke 5:
When do you officially become a Facebook stalker?
When you notice that someone’s Facebook profile picture changes and you are not even their friend!
Facebook Joke 6:
What is the new face of communalism?
Facebook groups! People are so freaking aggressive about it!
Facebook Joke 7:
Why do Facebook users have lower grades than non-Facebook users?
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This is because you do not need to use your brains to be on Facebook.
Facebook Joke 8:
The Facebook status of a girl committing suicide; ‘My Twitter account can remarry now…’
Facebook Joke 9:
What does a man tell God after he just dies?
Please let me go back. I forgot to tell my to wife to change her relationship status!
Facebook Joke 10:
Where will you find a man with too many debts? On Facebook trying to earn some cash in Mafia Wars!
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Top 5 Hilarious Jokes on Batman
For what reason do we like making Batman jokes? Is it because – regardless of the character being something made for kids – there’s unavoidable obscurity that exemplifies the style, as well as figured out how to spread out through whatever is left of the ordinance?
To such an extent that even the animated arrangement feels darker than consistent youngsters’ modifying? Or on the other hand is it because the idea of a developed man and his more youthful companion circling in tights offers to us in an adolescent and guileless way? Or then again perhaps it’s simply straightforward to make bat-based plays on words. Whatever the reason, we’ve assembled a rundown of our most loved jokes and plays on words in light of our most loved caped crusader. What’s more, indeed, these are the Batman jokes that you merit, and need.
What Happens When Batman Sees Catwoman?
The Dark Knight Rises
What Do You Call It When Batman Skips Church?
When Is Joker Not Plotting A Murder?
When he’s riding his Harley!
What’s The Difference Between Batman & A Robber
Batman can go into a store without Robin!
Batman & Robin Go Camping In The Desert:After setting up their tent and falling asleep, Batman wakes his faithful friend. “Robin, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”
Robin replies, “ I see millions of stars.”
“What does that tell you?” asks Batman.
Robin ponders for a minute.
“Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.
Chronologically, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.
Theologically, it’s evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.
Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.
What does it tell you, Batman?”
Batman is silent for a moment, then speaks:
“Robin, you idiot, someone has stolen our tent.”
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Source: The Ranker
Top 10 Funny Twitter Accounts To Follow
We as a whole need parts from work now and again to take the worry off our shoulders, and what preferred approach to unwind over to peruse a couple of entertaining tweets. In the event that you are an enthusiastic devotee of a tweeting decent time, you should take after these 10 accounts. Be exhorted, your comical inclination may differ.
We’ve discovered a portion of the wackiest spoof Twitter records of big names where they tweet the most illogical and interesting stuff. Keep in mind that you can put these records into a ‘parody’ list on Twitter so everything else is sifted through for you to appreciate. Likewise, prescribe your most loved tweet tracks to take after or tune in to.
You don’t need to be a Harry Potter fan to appreciate the tweets of ‘he who must not be named’. He tweets about hashtags that are drifting on Twitter with a little Harry Potter reference. Different circumstances he includes some Dark Lord fiendish into it. Now and then it work, different circumstances you laugh. [Followers: 2.2 million]
A sensation conveyed to the universe of Twitter. In the event that you don’t definitely think about misfortune Brian, the anecdotal character experiences situations that blowback on him. The cruel result of his activities appeared through tweets are out and out interesting, and quite often pitiful. [Followers: 417k]
Betty White is a TV character that the vast majority of the more youthful age won’t not think about, but rather should. She’s an on-screen character and entertainer who has been in the business for a long time (65 years), and this spoof account brings her crazy and over the top comical inclination into Twitter. [Followers: 116k]
Chuck Norris can do the absolute most ludicrous things an individual can do like counting to infinity, twice. This Twitter account with superhuman actualities of Chuck Norris will keep you engaged. Its silly jokes could (possibly) motivate you to be awesome as well. [Followers: 238k]
Late night TV have Conan O’Brien is positioned among the main 100 records with the most Twitter adherents – you can shape a nation with his devotees. The comic’s tweets are somewhat rough only the way his supporters like it. [Followers: 8.5 million]
This record is from the introduction of the internet sensation Condescending Wonka where he tweets of things that would affront your knowledge, condescendingly. Take after at your own particular risk. [Followers: 644k]
The ladies who take after this record would consent to nearly everything tweeted, while men who take after could take in a couple of things. In any case, it’s clever and invigorating, and worth after on the off chance that you need to survive the female species. [Followers: 1.2 million]
Will Ferrell has featured in numerous comedic motion pictures, this satire record of him truly portrays his amusing identity. There’s a considerable measure of unrefined funniness on his Twitter bound to influence your psyche to stop, stack, at that point get lines from giggling too hard. [Followers: 1.3 million]
Barney Stinson is a character of the TV show How I Met Your Mother. Any individual who watches it will realize that Barney is an epicly cool character that dependably needs to have some good times. Despite the fact that it’s a satire account, tweets here are so similar to him he’s keeping an eye on this Twitter account by and by. [Followers: 278k]
Aficionados of the prevalent US TV arrangement, The Office, would recollect the darnest things that Michael Scott says amid his chance there. This Twitter account is committed to his great and humiliating character where you’ll discover some of his significant statements The Office. [Followers: 25k]
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